• Posts
  • RSS
  • ◂◂RSS
  • Contact

  • Being a 'Real Man'

    September 20th, 2011
    gender  [html]
    I just overheard one of the salesguys mocking one of the programmers for declining some meat-containing food. He said "I always forget you don't eat meat; you look like a real man". Clearly joking, kind of obnoxious, playing off of our culture's ideas about what it means to be male.

    I used to believe that while defining masculinity in terms of consumption was silly, there were ways of defining it in terms of actions that were not. Being a real man would mean qualifying for the adjectives 'loyal', 'brave', 'strong'. Leading when appropriate. Supporting and protecting the people around you. Producing more than you consume.

    But I don't think putting these in with the idea of being male works. They are good qualities, and I think we should encourage them. But these being male attributes only makes sense if they are not also female attributes. Otherwise they are just human attributes. I don't see a reason to encourage these things in men at the cost of indicating that they are not also the province of women.

    If we remove from the concept of being a real man silly ideas like "eats lots of meat", "doesn't cook except on a grill", "can't dance", and "drives fearlessly and rapidly", and also remove ideas like "does what needs to be done" and "supports their family", what is left? I think there might not be anything.

    Comment via: google plus, facebook

    Recent posts on blogs I like:

    Willingness to look stupid

    People frequently1 think that I'm very stupid. I don't find this surprising, since I don't mind if other people think I'm stupid, which means that I don't adjust my behavior to avoid seeming stupid, which results in people thinking tha…

    via Posts on Dan Luu October 21, 2021

    Experiences in raising children in shared housing

    Sometimes I see posts about people’s hope to raise children in a group housing situation, and it often seems overly optimistic to me. In particular they seem to expect that there will be more shared childcare than I think should be expected. Today I talke…

    via The whole sky October 18, 2021

    EDT with updating double counts

    I recently got confused thinking about the following case: Calculator bet: I am offered the opportunity to bet on a mathematical statement X to which I initially assign 50% probability (perhaps X = 139926 is a quadratic residue modulo 314159). I have acce…

    via The sideways view October 12, 2021

    more     (via openring)


  • Posts
  • RSS
  • ◂◂RSS
  • Contact