::  Posts  ::  RSS  ::  ◂◂RSS  ::  Contact

Being a 'Real Man'

September 20th, 2011
gender  [html]
I just overheard one of the salesguys mocking one of the programmers for declining some meat-containing food. He said "I always forget you don't eat meat; you look like a real man". Clearly joking, kind of obnoxious, playing off of our culture's ideas about what it means to be male.

I used to believe that while defining masculinity in terms of consumption was silly, there were ways of defining it in terms of actions that were not. Being a real man would mean qualifying for the adjectives 'loyal', 'brave', 'strong'. Leading when appropriate. Supporting and protecting the people around you. Producing more than you consume.

But I don't think putting these in with the idea of being male works. They are good qualities, and I think we should encourage them. But these being male attributes only makes sense if they are not also female attributes. Otherwise they are just human attributes. I don't see a reason to encourage these things in men at the cost of indicating that they are not also the province of women.

If we remove from the concept of being a real man silly ideas like "eats lots of meat", "doesn't cook except on a grill", "can't dance", and "drives fearlessly and rapidly", and also remove ideas like "does what needs to be done" and "supports their family", what is left? I think there might not be anything.

Comment via: google plus, facebook

Recent posts on blogs I like:

Absolute scale corrupts absolutely

The Internet has gotten too big. Growing up, I, like many computery people of my generation, was an idealist. I believed that better, faster communication would be an unmitigated improvement to society. "World peace through better communication,"…

via apenwarr August 19, 2019

Traces

At naptime Anna listens to recordings of novels recorded by Jeff’s grandmother. It is the main way she will know Winnie, as it is the main way I have ever known Winnie. Some of the recordings are missing parts, and Suzie often fills in the first few sente…

via The whole sky August 18, 2019

One Night Ultimate Werewolf

I really like One Night Ultimate Werewolf (ONUW), and recommend trying it out. The Daybreak expansion is also good (but I’d skip the later games in the series). App For those who’ve played a lot and wish the night took 20 seconds rather than a few minutes…

via The sideways view August 18, 2019

more     (via openring)

More Posts:


  ::  Posts  ::  RSS  ::  ◂◂RSS  ::  Contact