Getting left-out people into a contra dance

May 24th, 2010
bida, contra
At contra dances I'll sometimes skip out on the initial partnering to see if there's someone who didn't end up with a partner but would like one. I've done this the most at dances where I have some sort of responsibility in the group (bida, the contra dances at swarthmore), but I try to do it whenever I notice people getting left out. This works pretty well at getting people in, especially new people. The main way it doesn't work is if I get asked to dance by an experienced dancer when I intend to be doing this. I can avoid that somewhat by making myself scarce refilling water pitchers or whatever, but sometimes people who are fun to dance with and will not be having any trouble finding a partner ask me right away. I can say "I'm sorry; I'm looking for a left out newcomer to dance with" but that's kind of strange and a bit of a mouthful. I think what I need is a name for this activity. Is there one already in use somewhere else? I'd like to be able to say "sorry, not this dance, I'm [name-of-this]ing".

Another advantage of a name is that even if the person I'm talking to doesn't understand me at the time beyond "jeff won't dance, need to find a different partner", if they come talk to me later I can give more detail and it will have a name attached.

Comment via: facebook, substack

Recent posts on blogs I like:

On AI writing in 2026

I use AI to write a little bit: I ask it for high level feedback on blog post drafts, make mechanical edits, and sometimes use it to brainstorm options for wording at a paragraph level. It’s unusual that I accept its wording or changes without modificatio…

via Home April 16, 2026

Some considerations on whether my job is evil

I. On an average weekend, only 1 in 20 Americans go to a party.

via Thing of Things April 14, 2026

Microfictions

A few microfictions, very much inspired by Quiet Pine Trees. I hope to add more over time. No LLMs.

via Evan Fields March 27, 2026

more     (via openring)