{"items": [{"author": "Bernadette", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222", "anchor": "fb-810275529222", "service": "fb", "text": "I learned the slightly middle road of \"taking turns\" from a friend with twins. This gets around the issue of who \"owns\" toys eg a play group. It means when there is a communal thing of toys, there's another polite option. \"Sam is having a turn now, you can have a turn later\". I guess this is sharing is optional at the particular moment of request, but with the expectation that other people also have a claim on communal goods.", "timestamp": "1473334256"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810281547162", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810281547162", "service": "fb", "text": "→ My experience so far is that kids get bored with communal things, so \"Sam is having a turn now, you can have a turn later\" is equivalent to \"Sam is using it right now, you can use it when same is finished\". Or are you talking about something where you set time limits?", "timestamp": "1473338172"}, {"author": "Bernadette", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810282275702", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810282275702", "service": "fb", "text": "→ No for toddlers it's pretty much exactly that, but I was impressed with how well it worked for her older kids (who were about 8.) With older children it seemed to help diffuse complaints of the form \"but I want to, it's not fair\".", "timestamp": "1473338746"}, {"author": "Bernadette", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810282340572", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810282340572", "service": "fb", "text": "→ (Though I have seen other friends with older kids find that the struggle for \"fairness\" is very, very tough. At least at one point they had to bring the digital scales to the table when serving dessert so nobody can complain to have got less!)", "timestamp": "1473338823"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810284990262", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810284990262", "service": "fb", "text": "→ With two kids \"one divides, the other chooses\" works pretty well.", "timestamp": "1473340160"}, {"author": "Sophia", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810285269702", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810285269702", "service": "fb", "text": "→ \"One divides, the other chooses\" only works if both kids are equally good at dividing...when my sister was little I always made her do the dividing, knowing she would accidentally create one much larger portion, and then I would choose that one.", "timestamp": "1473340471"}, {"author": "Josh", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810285504232", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810285504232", "service": "fb", "text": "→ For me, I was confused about why the second is called \"sharing is optional\", because the way I phrase it is sometimes more like \"you can keep playing with it, but when you're done, let Pat know\". So sharing is mandatory -- you aren't allowed to say \"no, this toy is mine now and you can't ever have it\" -- but not immediate.
(With exceptions for toys that really are your very own toy, of course -- in that case, I'd say that sharing is encouraged but not mandatory. But I feel like this mostly comes up in places where there are communal toys that are not in fact one kid's or another's.)", "timestamp": "1473340655"}, {"author": "Bernadette", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810290289642", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810290289642", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Jeff yup, these guys have to adjudicate between 4!
Josh in the articles Jeff links to there are certainly lots of anecdotes about parents forcing kids to share immediately upon request (including their own toys that they have brough to the park).", "timestamp": "1473341817"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810291961292", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810291961292", "service": "fb", "text": "→ @Sophia: did your sister perceive this as unfair?", "timestamp": "1473342498"}, {"author": "David Chudzicki", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810292929352", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810292929352", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Someone divides (maybe a parent, maybe a kid, not sure it matters) and then allocate the pieces randomly seems pretty good for the case where one kid is meaningfully worse at dividing.", "timestamp": "1473343174"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810293049112", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810293049112", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Random feels less fair.", "timestamp": "1473343290"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810293069072", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810293069072", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Maybe a parent divides, and then the kids bid on the right to choose first?", "timestamp": "1473343322"}, {"author": "Sophia", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810293084042", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810293084042", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Jeff: yes, but as the much younger sibling she was used to it. (I think my parents eventually stepped in but honestly I don't remember.)", "timestamp": "1473343339"}, {"author": "Sophia", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810293198812", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810293198812", "service": "fb", "text": "→ We are five years apart--I think this would be much less of an issue for closer-in-age kids.", "timestamp": "1473343388"}, {"author": "Josh", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810293513182", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810293513182", "service": "fb", "text": "→ When we're randomly selecting two things from a batch of things, I've enjoyed selecting one, and letting one kid decide whether they want that one, or the next random one. It's not clear to me that this is entirely fair, but it helps that I vary who gets to pick, and the novelty of it is interesting enough that they don't complain. :^)", "timestamp": "1473343559"}, {"author": "David Chudzicki", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810293647912", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810293647912", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Jeff: What do you bid? Parts of the pieces the parent cut? That'll get awkward!
Part of the motivation for random is guaranteeing equal expected value, even in the face of different skill at splitting, choosing, knowing what to bid, etc.", "timestamp": "1473343689"}, {"author": "David Chudzicki", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810293687832", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810293687832", "service": "fb", "text": "→ And assuming declining marginal utility, then the kids are both motivated to have the most skillful cutter (perhaps a parent if available - one of the kids if not) do the cutting.", "timestamp": "1473343745"}, {"author": "Sophia", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810295204792", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810295204792", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Or you could alternate which kid does the dividing and which the choosing.", "timestamp": "1473344738"}, {"author": "Ruthan", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810295693812", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810295693812", "service": "fb", "text": "→ I distinctly remember thinking as a small child (not in so many words) that the idea of \"taking turns\" was bullshit. I never saw an adult keep track of whose \"turn\" was next, nor enforce any time limits, so when I was supposed to \"take turns\" w a toy or piece of playground equipment, that either meant \"I can keep using it forever\" or \"I never get to use it.\"", "timestamp": "1473345111"}, {"author": "Josh", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810297330532", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810297330532", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Adults may not call it \"taking turns\", but I feel like we do sometimes do a thing where someone will say \"hey, can I use that when you're done with it\". And other more implicit things, like anything where there's a line for something (the bathroom, a restaurant, whatever), that's basically taking turns (and keeping track of who's next).", "timestamp": "1473345507"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810297375442", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810297375442", "service": "fb", "text": "→ David: bid money, from their allowance?", "timestamp": "1473345565"}, {"author": "David Chudzicki", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810297395402", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810297395402", "service": "fb", "text": "→ I think the turn-taking with adults is usually either (a) very prescribed, explicit rules (bathroom lines, the tennis court I mentioned), or (b) among friends. I'm having a hard time thinking of a case with strangers where the turn-taking is left up to someone's judgment.", "timestamp": "1473345626"}, {"author": "Allison", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810297565062", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810297565062", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Jeff, that sounds like an awful idea with a significant age gap; kids vary a lot in money skills by age. (My mom used to trade pennies or nickels for her sister's dimes, because the dimes were smaller! And they're closer in age than Sophia and her sister.)", "timestamp": "1473345714"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810297869452", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810297869452", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Sorry, the suggestion of bidding was a joke.", "timestamp": "1473345899"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810297944302", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810297944302", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Kids who can't divide evenly probably can't handle bidding either", "timestamp": "1473345920"}, {"author": "David Chudzicki", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810299022142", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810299022142", "service": "fb", "text": "→ I guess I took it seriously b/c there are versions of bidding that are less silly. \"This much cake can be yours from the start if I get to be the chooser instead of the divider.\"
But random still seems quite fair to me. It's really the only proposal I've heard that's fully symmetrical between the kids.", "timestamp": "1473346734"}, {"author": "David Chudzicki", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810275529222&reply_comment_id=810299316552", "anchor": "fb-810275529222_810299316552", "service": "fb", "text": "→ (And if the kids both like a different system better, like divider/chooser with bidding, then they can agree to adopt that. Random is a good baseline.)", "timestamp": "1473346939"}, {"author": "David Chudzicki", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810283293662", "anchor": "fb-810283293662", "service": "fb", "text": "This got me thinking about norms for adult sharing of communal resources. There's a lot of variation across contexts: You basically aren't ever expected to give up a table at a bar or a bench in a park. A bouldering route at a climbing gym you do once and then give it up.", "timestamp": "1473339608"}, {"author": "David Chudzicki", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810283293662&reply_comment_id=810283697852", "anchor": "fb-810283293662_810283697852", "service": "fb", "text": "→ At the park where David and I play tennis, there's a sign that says courts turn over on the hour, if people are waiting.", "timestamp": "1473339803"}, {"author": "Maggie", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810283722802", "anchor": "fb-810283722802", "service": "fb", "text": "I know another family in which the parents with the child decided which toys were not sharing toys; on noticing that they had things that they (the adults) did not share with friends!", "timestamp": "1473339832"}, {"author": "Josh", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810285793652", "anchor": "fb-810285793652", "service": "fb", "text": ">Specifically, when my kid has something another kid wants, I'm not sure how to handle it.
I think it'd be rude to say \"well tough, my kid has it and sharing is optional, now buzz off\"; I think it's not rude to say \"sure! my kid is taking a turn right now, but you can have the next turn\".
I predict that the grownups who say \"you have to share now!\" to their kids are at least sometimes doing that because they know that their particular kid won't share later unless prompted, so they do the prompting now and get it over with. Or maybe their kid has already had the toy for a while and the grownup figures it's time for the kid to be done with it. But I'd be surprised if they had a devout belief in the strong principle that whenever someone asks you to share something, it's a moral imperative to immediately give it to them.", "timestamp": "1473340918"}, {"author": "Todd", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810293568072", "anchor": "fb-810293568072", "service": "fb", "text": "I don't think it's any more rude to say, \"sorry, no\" to such a request than it would be if you were reading a book and an adult asked if they could read it. But it probably would be perceived as more rude in the child's toy case.", "timestamp": "1473343615"}, {"author": "Chloe", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810293568072&reply_comment_id=810392689432", "anchor": "fb-810293568072_810392689432", "service": "fb", "text": "→ This is a great example. Adults often request that kids give someone else a toy that they're in the middle of playing with. But adults would never expect someone to give up a book they were in the middle of reading.", "timestamp": "1473382072"}, {"author": "Kiran", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810293568072&reply_comment_id=810399156472", "anchor": "fb-810293568072_810399156472", "service": "fb", "text": "→ I think the difference is that the child is learning things the adult already knows. An adult wouldn't ask to borrow a book if they knew you were in the middle of it.", "timestamp": "1473384853"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810293568072&reply_comment_id=810407724302", "anchor": "fb-810293568072_810407724302", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Kiran: sounds like an ask culture vs guess culture difference", "timestamp": "1473389693"}, {"author": "Kiran", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810293568072&reply_comment_id=810408273202", "anchor": "fb-810293568072_810408273202", "service": "fb", "text": "→ How is this related to ask v. guess? Adults understand that only one person can read a book at a time.", "timestamp": "1473390078"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810293568072&reply_comment_id=810408353042", "anchor": "fb-810293568072_810408353042", "service": "fb", "text": "→ In guess culture you try to predict whether the person is done reading, while in ask you just ask if you can borrow it?", "timestamp": "1473390193"}, {"author": "Kiran", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810293568072&reply_comment_id=810409994752", "anchor": "fb-810293568072_810409994752", "service": "fb", "text": "→ For the analogy to work, the adult has to be reading the book, because the child is playing with the toy. No guessing required.", "timestamp": "1473391904"}, {"author": "Todd", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810293568072&reply_comment_id=810427369932", "anchor": "fb-810293568072_810427369932", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Kiran, are you suggesting that the child's lack of knowledge makes turning down their request rude, where it would not be rude if an adult made the same request?", "timestamp": "1473400315"}, {"author": "Kiran", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810293568072&reply_comment_id=810428153362", "anchor": "fb-810293568072_810428153362", "service": "fb", "text": "→ I'm saying that you might insist children share until they learn when the time is appropriate to share.", "timestamp": "1473401865"}, {"author": "Todd", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810293568072&reply_comment_id=810518841622", "anchor": "fb-810293568072_810518841622", "service": "fb", "text": "→ I don't understand why you wouldn't just teach them what you thought was appropriate right away.", "timestamp": "1473426985"}, {"author": "Kitty", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810300574032", "anchor": "fb-810300574032", "service": "fb", "text": "it also starts to snowball into consent issues ... if someone asks for my toy and i ALWAYS have to share it with them, what happens years down the road when they ask for access to my body?", "timestamp": "1473347712"}, {"author": "Kitty", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810300574032&reply_comment_id=810300643892", "anchor": "fb-810300574032_810300643892", "service": "fb", "text": "→ not to say that children (and adults) shouldn't learn how to share ... but i agree that always having to share anytime someone asks just so mom & dad can save face is not appropriate", "timestamp": "1473347770"}, {"author": "Sophia", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810300574032&reply_comment_id=811758222892", "anchor": "fb-810300574032_811758222892", "service": "fb", "text": "→ This article addresses this issue a bit. I like the authors use of \"be generous\" rather than \"share.\" http://adrielbooker.com/teaching-kids-body-privacy.../", "timestamp": "1474022810"}, {"author": "Jason", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810302545082", "anchor": "fb-810302545082", "service": "fb", "text": "Funny we teach this specifically
\"Ask him if he's willing to share when he's done or let you take a turn\"
\"Oh he's not done playing with it? Ok. You need to find something else to play with. When he's done you can play with it.\"
They're expected to have this go both ways between them (twins) and we haven't (yet) heard anything from daycare.
I do dread the day they run into the adult that requires the \"Sharing is mandatory, but it's never their turn to share\" mentality", "timestamp": "1473348480"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810302545082&reply_comment_id=810308682782", "anchor": "fb-810302545082_810308682782", "service": "fb", "text": "→ That side of the situation works reasonably well. It's how to handle it when another kid asks for a turn that's tricky in a mixed environment.", "timestamp": "1473348954"}, {"author": "Jason", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810302545082&reply_comment_id=810309531082", "anchor": "fb-810302545082_810309531082", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Yup, but we've been lucky so far.
And to address the \"Always someone elses turn!\" concept; they're only 4 so if they're taking turns we do enforce about 5-10min of playing and then handing it over.", "timestamp": "1473349578"}, {"author": "Elizabeth", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810309551042", "anchor": "fb-810309551042", "service": "fb", "text": "My elementary school mandated sharing toys you brought in from home, which was a deliberate attempt to discourage kids from bringing things in from home.", "timestamp": "1473349595"}, {"author": "Daniel", "source_link": "https://plus.google.com/106627634005073412802", "anchor": "gp-1473351931833", "service": "gp", "text": "I don't think it's a matter of being polite to other parents. I thinks it's they have the idea children should \"learn to share.\"", "timestamp": 1473351931}, {"author": "Divia", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810317445222", "anchor": "fb-810317445222", "service": "fb", "text": "I am strongly in favor of settling property disputes in kids using approximately adult rules. There are plenty of fascinating edge cases though!", "timestamp": "1473352664"}, {"author": "Cameron", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810317445222&reply_comment_id=810374930022", "anchor": "fb-810317445222_810374930022", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Let them spend their pocket money to pay for someone to argue on their behalf? Whoever runs out of money first loses.", "timestamp": "1473374387"}, {"author": "Todd", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810319710682", "anchor": "fb-810319710682", "service": "fb", "text": "http://www.tubechop.com/watch/8329845", "timestamp": "1473353716"}, {"author": "Daniel", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810334421202", "anchor": "fb-810334421202", "service": "fb", "text": "The rules of who gets to use a resource are determined by the owner of that resource.
If the toy belongs to the daycare, they determine who can play with it and under what circumstances (so, \"five minutes at a time if someone else requests it\" is reasonable and \"at the discretion of the adult supervisor\" is legitimate).
If the toy is communal but has no clear policy, like a swing set in a park with no posted rules, users should negotiate among themselves the rules, perhaps with the assistance of adults. Where game theory and defection in Iterated Prisoners Dilemma apply, educating children on WHY to cooperate is the job of the parent.", "timestamp": "1473360318"}, {"author": "Jessica", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810334421202&reply_comment_id=810381930992", "anchor": "fb-810334421202_810381930992", "service": "fb", "text": "→ I agree. If it's a toy at our house or someone else's house, the owner gets a say. If it's a communal toy I usually say to find a way to work together. It lets the kids practice the negotiation and leaves options for them to take turns, invent a new game or go separate ways. For me, a benefit of communal play spaces, including daycare, is that the kids must find a way to work together. I cringe when adults step in too quickly. Usually the kids can find a way through, even at a young age.", "timestamp": "1473377798"}, {"author": "\u05e0\u05d7", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810460209122", "anchor": "fb-810460209122", "service": "fb", "text": "One of the more disturbing kid-sharing-teaching things is teaching kids they MUST hug each other and/or their relatives. Bodily autonomy and having boundaries around things that are *mine* is important. It's pretty awful to implicitly teach \"you aren't old enough to deserve to have your boundaries respected\" to anyone. As said elsewhere in this thread, teaching game theory concepts of why sharing is good seems the far more sensible solution.", "timestamp": "1473419626"}, {"author": "\u05e0\u05d7", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810460209122&reply_comment_id=810461726082", "anchor": "fb-810460209122_810461726082", "service": "fb", "text": "→ Even in adult-world, I avoid spaces that expect every adult to allow every other adult access to their personal space (or else be seen as inexcusably inconsiderate). I'm about as hippie/socialist as they come, politically, but \"sharing/touching is mandatory\" environments are not my thing and shouldn't be forced on anyone.", "timestamp": "1473419801"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810460209122&reply_comment_id=810494540322", "anchor": "fb-810460209122_810494540322", "service": "fb", "text": "→ With hugging we ask \"would you like a hug\", \"would you like to give grandma a hug\" etc, and it's all optional, for the reasons you say.", "timestamp": "1473422171"}, {"author": "Erica", "source_link": "https://www.facebook.com/jefftk/posts/810268109092?comment_id=810517968372", "anchor": "fb-810517968372", "service": "fb", "text": "I've totally noticed this taking Alex to things like library story time. In instances where I'd actually prefer the kids to work it out themselves (with adult help only if things escalate), I still feel like I have to step in since I don't know the preferences of the other kid's caregivers.
Ditto for dog parks. If the dogs are wrasseling or humping each other, that's fine with me. And it's likely fine with most dog owners. But we all feel like we have to put a stop to it since you don't know the preferences of the others.
For places that have a separate small dog enclosure and large dog enclosure it might make more sense to have a roughhouse enclosure and a gentle enclosure instead.", "timestamp": "1473426362"}, {"author": "Jeff Kaufman", "source_link": "https://plus.google.com/103013777355236494008", "anchor": "gp-1473428758025", "service": "gp", "text": "@Daniel\n\u00a0Some parents have a \"kids need to learn to share\" approach, so when a random kid approaches your kid and wants their toy you (out of politeness) kind of need to act as if their parent has a \"kids need to share\" view. Even if that parent actually doesn't have that view, you don't have an easy way to find out.", "timestamp": 1473428758}]}